I DONT NEED ANY EXPLANATION, ALL I NEED IS HIM

John & I havE been intimate friends,we are realy close dat ppl call us husband & wife, bUt d funiest tin is dat we are nt dating,funny enough,we are secret lover 2 each oda,we feel 4 each oda,we do tins dat lovers do oda dan S*X,d truth is dat I luv him & I knw he does also bt no one has said it out,hmmm...

For over 12yrs now,I hav known him,he is so caring,luving and wat any woman can dream of,bcos of him,I neva had anytin 2do wit any male gender,and I've neva seen him wit any gal,we do answer each oda's call and I hav neva noticed d sign of any oda gal. D only tin dat I dnt get 4rm him is sex,though he knew am a virgin,sometyms I tak it dat he is waiting 4d right tym,most often I do feel horny and realy need a man inside me,bt d fact is dat I havent seen any man worth my 1st sex experience oda dan my John,I kept waiting and hoping,we are just luving each oda silently,anytym he cums around,his usual way of greeting me is kissing me on my fore head,and dat alwaz sends a sensation down my nerves dat I do get wet instantly,I will hold him very tite,wishing I could just tell him wat I needed at dat point.
Anytym we are 2geda and am on his laps,I usuall get wet uptil d extent dat my juicy wil roll down my legs,bt anytim I noticed a kind of erection in him,he do xcuse himself 2 ease d tension by standing up and doing tins dat wil bring about distraction,realy am starving inside bt am satisfied wit him in every oda tin hoping dat one day,he wil cum up wit d key 2 unlock my golden gate and dig 4rm my wet pot.
Just last 3 months,precisely on d val day,hmmm.... He proposed 2me,telling me dat he luvs and he wants us 2 define our relationship,omg.... D tym I hav eva waited 4,bt I tot my action was going 2 mak him seek 4 me more,dat it wil mak him pant after me d more,I need 2 delay my "YES" as a gal I tot it was d best option nt 2 mak me luk cheap,hmmm... I said 2 him dat actually am nt ready now,I tot he was going 2 persuade me,bt he neva said much,he only said he was happy dat atleast he has d opportunity 2 xpress his heart desire 2me,I told him neva mind,dat I wil let him knw wen am ready bt all dese were all fallacy,I am ready like ready,he made a statement,dat he also want 2 b sure he neva offended me which I told him am okay.
As we are about leaving d food cafe',I told him 2 do me a favour,dat he knws 2day is lovers' day,I just requested a kiss 4rm him,hmmm... As he was bringing his mouth 2 mine,I luk in2 his eyes,I saw luv fire burning in him,I grabbed him wit force as we are standing dere,it was my 1st mouth-to-mouth kiss wit him,it lasted 4 about 30seconds bt my whole panties were soaked wit my juicy,I neva knew dat I could cum just by kissing him,I wish I could just hav him dig me now,hmmm..bt I needed 2 wait.
Days hav gone,weeks hav gone and months too,nobody talked about luv among us,bt he neva changed 4rm who he is.
Am just here wit tears rolling down my eyes,my heart is heavy,could dis b truth or is it a kind of techniques he wants 2 use 2 mak me say yes?
Here wit my is John's wedding invitation card wit anoda gal's name on it and dey are 2 wed in a month tym,God am finished,I need him,I cant be wit any oda man apart 4rm him,"John plz dnt go" I kept on crying 2my self,I hav tried calling him,he said he wil xplain,dat it wasnt his fault,omg God,I dnt need any xplanation,all I need is him.
**Plz friends I need ur help,do u tink he used dis invitation card as a technique 2 mak me say "YES"?
If it is true dat he is getting married 2 anoda gal,wat can I do? I need him & I cant afford 2 loose him.
Omg God am finished,did I do a wrong tin by delaying my "yes" wen truely I knw I luv him too?
Is it appropraite 4 a gal 2 just say "yes" 2 a guy just on him proposing 4d 1st tym even though dat gal luvs him? Wont it mak her luk cheap?